Thursday, June 30, 2011

Two Southerners and a Scotsman

I wrote this last night but the internet was being stupid. 
Our number has finally dwindled down to just three. Everyone has left except me, Joe(from Scotland), and, obviously, Danny. We're allegedly getting some new people on Friday, but we've been told that before and no one has shown up. Here's an update on my super exciting life!!!
Last weekend Danny had to go back to California for a wedding, so he left early Thursday morning with no hopes of us getting much work done while he was away. That was smart. Carter, an ex-Mormon who arrived the same day I did, left midday Thursday and Thursday evening we were expected to take Liz, a Brit who got here about a week before I did, to Green River to catch a bus to go to Vegas (eventually I'll get around to actually just describing all the people I've encountered here). 
So Thursday around lunch a game of beer pong began. I was not ready to continue drinking, so while I read the rest of the beer in the house was quickly consumed. Soon I was asked to drive everyone into town so we could procure 2 more 30packs so the beer pong could continue. At this point it was also established that I would remain sober all day (which I was happy to do) so everyone could continue on their bender and we would all go to drop off Liz, while still drinking. We left around 4 and began the 2.5hr drive to the town of Green River, UT, which is the nearest Amtrak and Greyhound stopping points. I really don't know why, because Green River has like 2 streets and 4 gas stations, but unfortunately, I've now spent a lot of time there.
The car ride was amusing to say the least. Although its definitely illegal, everyone else was drinking and were pretty drunk. At some point Lee and Joey decided that they needed to become "blood brothers," so they cut one another's fingers, but since they were drunk after they pressed them together they didn't stop bleeding. Long story short, they both ended up with blood all over their teeth and gave themselves blood goatees. They walked around Green River like this. After waiting for the bus for about 2hr Liz decided it wasn't coming, so Joey agreed to drive her to Las Vegas the next day (he was going to go back home anyway because he broke his foot earlier in the week on Trashy Tuesday during a dance party), so they got another 30pack and we drove back to the canyon.
Finally, on Friday, it became just me, Lee (a guy from South Carolina who had been here since April), Joe (the Scotsman), and the dogs. I spent most of the morning cleaning but we did get some work done on the cabin that afternoon. That evening, as we were settling down to watch Blow, the power went out. I kind of knew how to turn the generator on, so I went and pressed some buttons and it came on. However, the power didn't come back on so we had to get a neighbor to help. Not surprisingly I didn't turn on the generator correctly.
We spent most of Saturday in Moab, UT, however, we had to take the trash to the dump beforehand. Basically as soon as Danny left on Thursday the dogs started misbehaving. One of the great things they did was get into the trash and spread it all over the garage and yard. Predictably, no one bothered to actually pick any of it up, so we had to deal with that, which was disgusting. After I swept and bleached the garage and took a shower we made our way to Moab. Its allegedly supposed to be some little touristy-outdoorsy town, so I figured there would be enough things to do there to keep us occupied for the day. I was wrong. After about 2hr of walking about we decided to just drive the five minutes down the road and go to Arches National Park for a bit, which was a wonderful decision. We didn't get there until about 5, so we didn't have much time to do things, but we went on a small little hike and drove around to see the views. I'm trying to get Danny to take me back this week so we can go on a longer hike since the pass I had to buy is valid for a week. We got back to the house and started drinking. I actually was able to use this neat app on my phone where you list all the alcohol you have and then it tells you what drinks you can make. We did that for a bit and made some really horrible drinks and then I went to bed.
Finally Sunday came around and I was very ready for Danny to get back. We spent all morning cleaning and put in a pork shoulder, which needed to cook for 8hr, as a nice surprise for Danny when he got back(we expected him about 11ish). Just as I was about to make my way back to shower and clean our bedroom, Joe came running into the kitchen saying that we had a problem. We followed him to the bathroom to find that sewage had begun backing its way back up the bathtub and all the shower drains. We were at an utter loss at what to do. We, meaning the boys, didn't want to get the neighbor since he'd already been over twice and we couldn't get ahold of Danny. So we did that only thing there was to do; We began drinking. Several drinks/shots and a few episodes of It's Always Sunny [In Philadelphia] later, I decided it was time to alert someone of our problem. Just as I was rallying the boys, Chuck (the neighbor) rode his ATV down the driveway. It was destiny. We went out and let Chuck in on our situation.
Technically Chuck is the vineyard manager, so he at least had an idea of how to fix it, however, Chuck almost continually stoned and we were all drunk, so it was kind of a shit show. After about 45min of Chuck kind of doing stuff (or at least looking like it) and us standing around helplessly/drunkenly, Danny drove down the driveway. He was able to get an early flight back, which would have been great if I was showered, shaved, and there wasn't shit invading his house via the drains.  After about another hour or so Chuck and Danny (mainly Danny) unclogged the septic tank, which is disgusting, and the sewage drained back down to its ungodly home under the house. All that was left to do was clean the showers and tub and keep drinking!
Monday was a recovery day up until noon, when we had to drive up to Grand Junction, CO, another 3.5hr drive. We went to Sam's Club and stocked up on the items that needed to be purchased in bulk, but then we had to drop Lee off at the airport. Just the three of us, plus the dogs, made the ride back and it was lonesome. Unfortunately Danny has been sick all of yesterday and today, so we really haven't done much. I finally got to clean our room/bathroom! But today Joe and I did spend some time outside weeding.
I'm trying very hard to not focus on the fact that I will be leaving soon, actually in  about a week, which I only grudgingly came to realize last night. However, Danny is going to take me up to Crested Butte, CO the night before I depart, so thats kind of something to look forward to. Actually, if we make it up there we'll only be missing my mom, her sisters, and my grandmother by about a week. I got a chance to talk to Maddie on Monday night, which was very nice. As much as I don't want to come home I do miss a few select people and I am incredibly excited about the last part of DH. Also, I was supposed to talk to Sybil and Molly on Saturday night, but I never received their call. I assume the only reason they would neglect to phone me is death, so if someone can tell me where to send some flowers I would greatly appreciate it...

Joey and Lee with blood all over their mouths.

Delicate Arch, which doesn't look very delicate, but its actually on the side of a cliff.

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